阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 1楼       Always Thirsty         　　"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."        　　"That''s terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"        　　"No, but I am always thirsty!"                        总感到口渴        　　一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。”        　　真是太糟糕了！”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗？”        　　不疼，可是我总感到口渴。                 ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → act  vi.行动；见效 n.行为  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:30:38 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 2楼       A Useful Way        　　Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?         　　Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.         　　Father: What''s that got to do with it?         　　Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.                一个有效的方法        　　爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝这么多水呀？         　　杰克：我刚才吃了个苹果，爸爸。         　　爸爸：可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢？         　　杰克：我忘了洗苹果呀。                 ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → shopping  n.买东西，购物  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:31:16 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 3楼       Never Mind 　         　　A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. "They''ve stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, even the brake pedal!" he cried out.        　　However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time "Never mind," the drunk said with a hiccup, "I got in the back seat by mistake."                坐到了后座上         　　一个醉汉打电话给警察局，报告小偷光顾了他的车，“他们偷走了仪表盘、方向盘，甚至连刹车脚板都偷走了。”        　　然而在警察还没有开始调查时，电话又一次响了起来，“没事了”，醉汉打着嗝说，“我不小心坐到了后座上。”                 ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → accord  n.调和，符合；协议  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:31:41 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 4楼       Expensive Advice         　　The doctor finally reached his table at a dinner, after breaking away from a woman who sought advice on a health problem.        　　"Do you think I should send her a bill?" the doctor asked a lawyer who sat next to him.        　　"Why not?" the lawyer replied. "You rendered professional services by giving advice."        　　"Thanks," the physician said. "I think I''ll do that."        　　When the doctor went to his office the next day to send the bill to the woman, he found a letter from the lawyer. It read:        　　"For legal services, $50."                昂贵的建议        　　大夫在打发走了一个就健康问题向他咨询的妇女之后，最后来到餐桌上。        　　你认为我应该向她收费吗？”大夫问坐在身边的一个律师。        　　有什么不应该？”律师答道，“你通过提建议提供了职业性服务。”        　　谢谢，”大夫说道，“看来我得这么做。”        　　第二天当大夫去办公室给那位妇女写账单时，他收到律师的一封信。信中写道：        　　请付法律服务费50美元。”         ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → correction  n.改正，纠正，修改  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:33:02 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 5楼       A smart housewife         　　A smart housewife was told that there was a kind of stove which would only consume half of the coal she was burning. She was very excited, and said: "Thatll be terrific! Since one stove can save half of the coal, if I buy two, no coal will be needed!"                 精明的家庭主妇        　　一位精明的家庭主妇听人说有一种炉子用起来可以比她现在用的炉子省一半的煤。她听了大为兴奋，说：“那太好了！一个炉子可以省一半的煤，那么如果我买两个炉子的话，不就可以把煤全都省下来了吗？”                 ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → axis  n.轴，轴线；第二颈椎  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:34:20 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 6楼       Reached Shore Fast         　　A guy I know was towing his boat home from a fishing trip to Lake Huron when his car broke down. He didn''t have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be able to raise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance. He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, "Mayday, mayday." A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State your location." "I-75, two miles south of Standish." After a very long pause, the officer asked, "How fast were you going when you reached shore?"        　　                快速靠岸         　　在休伦湖钓完鱼后，我的一个朋友开车拖着他的船回家。路上车坏了。他没带手机，不过，他想，也许他可以通过海事无线广播来请求公路援助。于是，他爬到他的船里面，启动了无线装置，喊道，“求救，求救”。一名海岸护卫队警官作出了回应，“报告你的位置”。“I-75号公路，Standish的南面两英里”。沉默了好一会之后，警官问我的朋友，“你的船靠岸时开得有多快？ ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → sunset  n.日落(时分)  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:35:33 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 7楼       The Doctor Knows Better          　　A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill."         　　"I am afraid that he is dead." said the doctor.        　　Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I''m not dead. I''m still alive."        　　"Be quiet, " said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"                医生懂得多        　　一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院。他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说：“我想他伤得很厉害。”        　　医生说：“恐怕他已经死了。”        　　听到医生的话，这个男人转动着头说：“我没死，我还活着。”        　　妻子说：“安静，医生比你懂得多。                 ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → sick  a.有病的；恶心的  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:36:17 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 8楼       The Looney Bin         　　Late one night at the insane asylum (疯人院）one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!”Another one said, "How do you know?"         　　The first inmate said, "God told me!"         　　Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did not!"                 疯人院         　　一天晚上，在疯人院里，一个病人说：“我是拿破仑！”另一个说：“你怎么知道？”第一个人说：“上帝对我说的！”一会儿，一个声音从另一个房间传来：“我没说！” ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → summit  n.顶点，最高点；极度  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:36:42 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 9楼       Boxing and Running         　　Dan is teaching his son how to box. As he does so, he left his friend, "This is a tough world, so I’m teaching my boy to fight."         　　Friend: "But suppose he comes up against someone much bigger than he is, who’s also been taught how to box."         　　Dan: "I’m teaching him how to run, too."                 拳击和赛跑         　　丹在教他的儿子怎样拳击。他告诉他的朋友：“这是一个粗暴的世界，所以我要教我的儿子怎么去拼搏。”         　　朋友：“如果他碰上的对手是一个比他高大，健壮而且也会拳击的人怎么办？”         　　丹：“我也会教他怎么样赛跑呢。” ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → bacon  n.咸猪肉，熏猪肉  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:37:25 |回复|返回|

阳光宝宝 90

□ 主题： 回应:英语笑话集锦  □ 内容： 10楼       A preacher is buying a parrot        　　"Are you sure it doesn''t scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher.        　　"Oh absolutely. It''s a religious parrot", the storekeeper assures him.        　　"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lords prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."        　　"Wonderful!" says the preacher, "but what happens if you pull both strings?"        　　"I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!" screeched the parrot.                一个传教士在买鹦鹉        　　““你确信它不会尖叫，大叫或诅咒别人吗？”传教士问。        　　““哦，绝对不会。它是一只虔诚的鹦鹉。”店主保证说。        　　““你看见它腿上的这些细绳了吗？当你拉动右面的这根，它会背诵天主经，当你拉动左面的那根，它会背诵赞美诗”。”        　　““太棒了！”传教士说，“但是如果我同时拉动两条绳子，会发生什么呢？””        　　““我会从树干上掉下去的，你这个笨蛋！””鹦鹉尖声说道。         ——        □ 争分夺秒背单词 → English  n.英语 a.英国人的  □ 发帖时间：2009-2-22｜16:38:28 |回复|返回|

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